Anger

I was squatting upon the branch of a tree, looking for a flock to land on the lake near by. One fleet of stocks landed on the waters to have their feed. Like them I was also waiting for my hunt for the day. I took aim at one of the big ones. Suddenly they all took off into the blue sky. I looked below the tree. A procession of monks were crossing the lakeside, chanting loudly, ” Buddham Sharanam Gachami… Buddham Sharanam Gachami…

I shouted at them, ” What have you done, you silly monks. I have lost my prey because of your chanting. Now, how will I feed my stomach today ?”

One of them came forward and replied, ” Sorry for disturbing my brother. But why so much rage against the poor birds ? What use is of this violence ? Let them live. Let yourself live without such grave burden”

“Hahaha….silly monk. How would I live if I let them live ?  Life feeds on life. And I would like to live. ” I retorted at his silly argument.

“As Buddha says, Life is such. But I request you to leave this violent way. Nature will take care of everyone. You can share our alms for today.”

He offered me a share of his alms – rice and some fruits. I got down from the tree-top and partook the food. I was very hungry and started chomping the fruits then and there.

Looking at me with a serene smile on his face, the monk said ,” Throw away your anger like the remains of that fruit. Your life will be much pleasant journey then.”

Saying that the group started back their chanting and moved on from the lakeside.

I threw away the remains of the fruit, completely clueless about what he meant. One flock of cranes landed in the lake. My stomach was satisfied for now, but not of my wife and child. I pulled the bow’s string, took an aim, made a kill shot. Their bellies will be full today.

***

Yama called me forth and looked at my soul with his cold and dead eyes. He was dictating Chitragupta something, glancing at me in short pauses. I looked behind the big black gate bordered with gold & silver plating. Its splendour was overtaken by its grimness. I looked behind the door – some Yamdoots were filling a pool with black greasy oily liquid. I remembered the childhood stories of ones body fried in oil afterlife – but there was no fire or any utensil.

My curiosity took hold of my soul and I asked Yama directly, ” What are they filling that pool with ? and what is that liquid for ?”

Yama tilted his head back and came back to me, ” It is fat-oil of the animals , they are going to bath you with it.”

Still confused,I sheepishly asked again, ” But why are you bathing me with animal oil ? Is that all one has to go through after death ?”

A glorious laughter resounded the hellish abode, Yama explained, ” That animal oil is from all those creatures you killed in your lifetime. And those arrows are all those arrows that you used to pierce those poor beings. With all your anger you have filled your life with – we will fire the hearth below the pool. Then you will be pierced with those arrows and then put inside the boiling grease. According to Chitraguptas’ calculation it requires that you be fried till three-forth of an eon.”

I was dumbstruck, baffled and shivering at the grim picture Yama just painted for me. I was paralysed from my bony toes to my strands of grey hair.
I recalled that incident near the lake side – the procession of the monks. Now I understood what he meant by throwing away my anger. Why in the heaven did I not take their advice ? Why? ….

….”WHY????” (I screamed inside)

– Arigato

This post is part of the Dungeon Prompt Season 2 : Anger Management. Other contributors list will be posted below after the end of the prompt week.

Update: List of other contributors

Kind of Defeated – MarthaOstout

Valentine’s Day – SplitSpeak

An Animal Caged – TJ Therien

Anger Management: Road Rage – Schizo Incognito

Anger – Contemplating Me

A Conversation About Anger – Stop the Stigma

 A rit of fealous jage – Alienorajt

Anger – Never a Worry

Anger management – It’s a Lonely Place

Anger’s Alibi – Dream Cloud Diaries

Anger, Kyrielle Sonnet – Bastet and Sekhmet’s Library

Thoughts on Anger – Shadows of the Divine

Managing – A Thing of Grace

Memories of My First Rage – Traces of the Soul

Solution, Meditate – Hell on My Heels

To be Feared or Loved – The Seeker’s Dungeon

Anger Management – Writing Works in Progress

An Innocent Monster – Follow Your Shadow

P.S – I wanted to just write a story on it. Lately, I have been working on things and failing at them at the last stage of work. It gets really frustrating and I get angry a lot. It is hard to control anger or should I say throw it away.

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Single Exam Brouhaha

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Note: Long post, read at your own leisure.

There has already been so much comments & opinions on the proposed merger of admission test for all engineering colleges including IITs, NITs & other institutes. There is discussion of dilution of standards or IITs; degrading the brand of IIT; incomparable marking schemes of different board exams and many other assumed & sought for problems. I don’t want to comment on the standards or IIT per se, but on the recent trends of merging of examination systems for engineering, medical,  mba & other exams.

Last year only I was having discussion with my friends & my father that this govt. just wants to standardize the college admission process on the line of global trends i.e. like SAT score. I think the finally in India also we will be using SAT, might be with some other name. The most appalling motive I feel is that govt. wants foreign university opening branches in India or their funds for education sector. On first thought it looks great, Oxford India, MIT India e.t.c. We cannot provide even primary education for all, but want everyone to have an option of global university. Is there an assumption that all those who go to college are rich & have the luxury to spend huge amounts for a mere graduation or post-graduation. There are so many sub-standard colleges in our country which are running below their quotas & being run like corporate houses. Too much mud-slinging on the influx of foreign education institutions in India, let me get to the point of single base exam system.

Kudos to the institutes & authorities on easing the pressure on students by unifying the various entrance exams. Now, they just need to give full into one single exam. Uncertainty factor will lessen down as one will know which college he is eligible for. No college will exploit the students by declaring the date of admission just before some other exam results are out. Students will focus more on school activities as major part will be dependent on the board papers & ones personality will be judged by the extracurricular or exceptional work done by the student. Although It is sought that students will not take coaching but on the contrary they are going to enrol more into them. This effect can be bought if the exam level is very low or like school level, then also for the increased competition level they will surely join them. I mainly wanted to highlight the negative side of the reformed system. So here it goes.

This  step just infuriates me, possibly because this opportunity was not with me. However, howsoever pressure multi exam puts on a student, everyone will agree that it gave multiple opportunities to score & get a good college. One might mess up one exam but he will have other exams to try again in next exam. This might become better with new system but still I would prefer a multiple chance then a single-shot game. Anything can happen in an exam.

Second, it just goes away from the core competency of Indian students to perform in pressure situations & handle many fronts at a time & also much tougher and varying exam patterns than global exams.

Thirdly, it present the problem of measuring everyone with a single scale. Judging by the ability of a cat to fly, a fish to run & a bird to swim is ridiculous. All the nerds are at loss. Now school performance & extra-curricular activities will matter. You can’t say I am a fish, I can’t walk on the land – you have to become an amphibian now.

Hope you get the metaphors of the top & bottom fruit basket pictures.

Fourth, It doesn’t stops the propagation of sub-standard colleges, nor does it promises a quality education for all. Fifth, this type of steps in India should have taken when there would be similar standard institutes. Even between IITs & NITs there is considerable difference in facilities, quality of education & research work. The pvt. Institutes are in there own world it seems. With all this systems in place & one would get seats in pvt. Institutes by taking loans. Yeah! congratz to all the students who would get into the debt cycle before starting their job. I think if students suicide lowers down then we’ll see increase in working class suicides.

All this came out because of strong feelings for the education sector in India. More things are on negative fronts, but let’s see we might get better & shining education system Just wait & watch.

P.S – I totally support the unified JEE. After all for what should they have a Brand? Are they education institutes or products? What do they actually do for the grass roots of the country?

One more thing, I expect there will be huge black money inflow or scams in education sector with more reforms in the future.

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